The Courage Practice ®

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On Alignment

We cannot always take people with us.

To live with integrity to our deepest values and truth, sometimes courage asks us to move forward in a specific way.

The great Maya Angelou said, "when you know better, you do better." 

Yet the quest to do better sometimes means we no longer align with what we once knew.

When we reach intersections in our lives and hearts between who we once were and who we actually are, we often pause because we want to take those we love along with us. 

Simply put, we want the personal growth and evolution and the community we've always known. 

Courage reminds us that our travels to live in our integrity are our very own. We don’t get to bring others with us. Sometimes this means walking alone for awhile. Sometimes this means building a new community where our integrity is not betrayed every time we engage in conversation or common activities.

IF YOU’RE LIVING AT THE INTERSECTION OF YOUR LIFE BECAUSE YOUR EVOLUTION AND INNER KNOWING IS IN CONFLICT WITH THOSE YOU LOVE, I SEE YOU. 

I lived here—at this intersection—for years, emotionally, relationally, socially, spiritually and politically. I didn’t want to travel alone so I pulled up a camp chair at this intersection and tried to live there because I knew I couldn’t take most of who I loved with me. I’m sure you can guess what happened…

I lost myself in trying to hold onto them. 

And in finally choosing myself, I still lost many of them anyway. 

But it does get better. It really, really does.

Living in alignment with who we are is the beginning of every other goodness we can imagine. Alignment in practice cultivates inner belonging. We become an active participant in community without the need for perpetual seeking of external affirmation because we have created an inner place of contentment, acceptance, and ease.

Keep walking, friend. Keep moving forward in alignment with what you know to be true.

Keep educating yourself to understand the world you actually live in instead of the one your privilege wants you to live in. Keep healing so you can release the perpetual patterns running on repeat in your life and relationships. Keep unlearning old patterns of conditioning that no longer serve you too.

Accept where you are — full stop. Accept this intersection. Accept that you may not be able to take everyone you want with you on this journey. Accept the loneliness — again and again. Acceptance will always guide you to the next steps — it’s the beginning of all desired change.

Look ahead for a moment now.

That life you envision that brings you greater ease and inner peace?

Be relentless in your pursuit of creating it.

With you in this practice,

Tonyalynne